Saturday, June 28, 2008

New Shelby Steele Subtitles

Brothers, Sisters, and Transgendered Comedists Everywhere,

This weekend we have a mighty task in front of us, we need to help African-American conservative commentator, author, and Hoover Institute fellow with his new book. See, he titled it "A Bound Man: Why We Are Excited About Obama and Why He Can't Win." But then when asked why he thinks Obama can't win, he admitted that he actually thinks "he can definitely win." He said in an interview with Sean Hannity that he regrets the subtitle,

"It was an afterthought. And I don't argue that in the book. He can definitely win. There is a powerful desire in American society today to see someone like him move to the White House."
Why would he choose THAT subtitle? Why would the thought of such a proclamation on the cover of the book seem like a good idea at the time even though it was nowhere argued for in the book itself and is a position the author doesn't hold? The answer, of course, it's provocative and would sell books making Shelby Steele more money.

So, since he's having to distance himself from that subtitle, what would be other subtitles that have nothing to do with the book's content, but would be guaranteed to increase his sales can we think of?

How about:

A Bound Man: Pictures from the Bowels of Dick Cheney's BDSM Chamber
A Bound Man: Everyone Who Buys This Book is Bound to Get Free Beer
A Bound Man: Walks Into A Bar and Orders a Beer (joke finished in chapter 8)
A Bound Man: And How He Lost 53 Pounds Eating Only Chocolate Chip Cookies

Come on, my dear Comedist friends, help out a poor (rich) conservative in need by contributing a suggestion for a subtitle guaranteed to move books.

Live, love, and laugh,

Irreverend Steve