Pity Party

Quick note: I will be playing HighTops in Timonium Sunday night. It's a new venue for comedy and supposed to be a very nice room, so support is greatly appreciated. It's a free show with some quite good comics on the bill, so I can guarantee some laughs and I'll be doing new material, so please come out if you can.

It's been a while since we've had a pity party, so let's go at it.

I feel sorry for Mel Gibson. His wife of 28 years is divorcing this wonderful, kind, upstanding, anti-Semitic, piece of garbage who called a female police officer "Sugartits." The irony would be if she had a Jewish lawyer.

I feel sorry for George Will. Long considered the heir to William F. Buckley as the primary voice of reason and elitist intellect on the right, his period of dotage has arrived. Sure, it was bad to write a misinformed piece denying global warming, and then follow it up with more denials of global warming in which the researchers whose data he was interpreting publicly said that he had misunderstood their work. But now, this piece is just plain sad. He is railing against the wearing of blue jeans. "Those kids today in their dungarees..." I think we've finally reached that point where mom and dad have no choice but to agree to move gramps into an assisted living facility here, we just can't care for George Will at home anymore.

I feel sorry for Norm Coleman. Not only did he lose, but now he reminds me of Michael Schaivo. His beloved bid to keep his Senate seat has been dead for months and everyone knows it, but it has been kept on artificial life support by right-wingers for nothing but temporary and shallow political gain. Let it die with dignity, please.

So, who do you feel sorry for?