From the "I Want to See the Grant Application for This One" File

Psychologists in Bristol have documented the existence of beer goggles. No word on whether the lead investigator's tenure file would look more attractive after a few nips.

The team had also hoped to report their other startling findings related to the supposed correlation between the use of marijuana and the ingestion of Doritos until some of the researchers were strangely overcome by feelings of paranoia.