Saturday, September 20, 2008

Are the End Times Here?

Brothers, Sisters, and Transgendered Comedists Everywhere,

Some have accused Comedism of being a mesironic cult because there is a faction that believe in the end times and these folks are beginning to make noise. They look at the irony of this week and see in it the prophesied four cold sores of the Apocalips. Could we take a look at the political race and bust a gut? Is it indeed the coming of the rupture?

This week we had Carly Fiorina telling us that the candidates were unfit to run Hewlett-Packard. While one wants a CEO who keeps the ship stable, her purchase of Compaq worked like an anchor as the competition sailed by. Having Carly Fiorina say you are unqualified to run H-P is like getting firearms safety tips from Dick Cheney, like having Michael Moore tell you you need to drop a couple pounds, like having Keith Richards tell you that you might have a drug problem, like having John McCain check your source code for syntax errors, like having Bill O'Reilly tell you to shut up, get the idea.

Of course we also had John McCain telling us that the fundamentals of the economy were strong just as the economy teetered on the edge of full blown meltdown (must avoid cliched Titanic reference...rrrrrrr). Of course, one of the main reasons for it was deregulation snuck through by Phil Gramm, the man who wrote McCain's economic plan and whose wife was a board member of Enron. McCain's responses: call for the head of the head of the Securities and Exchange Commission -- yeah, your partner did away with the law, so blame the sheriff for not enforcing the law which he made sure would no longer be the law.

Finally, to simply explode the ironometer, a former Clinton supporter endorsed Senator McCain because Obama is, for her taste, too much of an elitist. The Clinton turned McCain supporter? Lady Lynn de Rothschild. Yes, a woman who was worth $100 million and THEN MARRIED INTO THE ROTHSCHILD FAMILY is calling someone an elitist from her estate in Buckinghamshire...or was it from her home in New York? Since when do Rothschilds endorse candidates? I thought according to the Protocols of the Elders of Zion, they simply had them installed.

That's three...will there be a fourth irony as prophesied in the Book of Revulsions? If so, what could be more ironic than these?

Are these really the end times? If not and you happen to be in Baltimore, I'll be doing a short set at Damon's in Hunt Valley Sunday night at 9. Stop by and say hi. I'll be trying out some new material.

Live, love, and laugh,

Irreverend Steve